3 THINGS you need to know about cohabitation
Cohabitation
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ohabitation once a rare is now a norm has evolved and is being called all sorts of beautiful names: Call it Cohabiting/ semi marriage/ come we stay/ living together/ nusu mkate!
It has been found that a majority of young men and women of marriageable age especially in institutions of higher learning today will spend some time in a cohabiting relationship. Some of the most given reasons for cohabiting include: rent sharing, immediate gratification of sex, security, money amongst others.
It has been found that a majority of young men and women of marriageable age especially in institutions of higher learning today will spend some time in a cohabiting relationship. Some of the most given reasons for cohabiting include: rent sharing, immediate gratification of sex, security, money amongst others.
3 THINGS you need to know about cohabitation
- Living together is considered to be more stressful than being married.
Unlike in marriage cohabiting is more demanding. Most cohabiting students are financially unstable. In most cases they will try side jobs to meet their daily demands. At times it becomes difficult to balance on studies, side jobs and maintain the relationship. This may result to stress.
- Just over 50% of first cohabiting couples ever get married.
It has been found that less than half of the cohabiting couples end up in a successful marriage. Most of them instead resolve to remain single. This can be attributed to emotional stress experienced in such relationships. Other reasons include cheating, physical abuse and poor performance in academic fields.
- Couples who lived together before marriage tend to divorce early in their marriage.
A study conducted in 1997 concluded that cohabitation increased young people acceptance to divorce compared to independent living. The study also showed that after about 3 months since living together, most young people becomes less enthusiastic toward childbearing and marriage. Most of such marriages preceded by cohabiting poses a challenge to the partners especially on communicating on matters affecting them. In fact Chuck Colson (1995) who is an author, researcher and public speakers says “Cohabitation -- it's training for divorce."
Wendy: I was wrong and I know it. All that stuff about freedom and independence are empty words... it did offer convenience and freedom all right, but only for Jim. De facto relations as an arrangement works for the males and not for us ... After six months I could realize how this relationship was putting me deeper into insecurity and exploitation. I was investing my time and effort looking after him, I was neglecting my career, and had nothing in return, except that I could leave him at any time, which for me was far from a privilege... This is not a reward for our contribution to our families but an easy escape for males...Living in this arrangement offers a lot of freedom to one partner to exploit the other.
REFERENCES
1. Premarital Sex, Premarital Cohabitation, and the Risk of
subsequent Marital Dissolution Among Women
by Jay Teachman
by Jay Teachman
3. Toward a Greater Understanding of the Cohabitation
Effect: Premarital Cohabitation and Marital Communication
by Catherine L. Cohan and Stacey Kleinbaumb
by Catherine L. Cohan and Stacey Kleinbaumb
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